The Environmental Destruction Mobile

When we last left our heroes, they had unanimously agreed to make an attempt at taking over the world.  We noe join them as they leave the meeting....

"Is he coming out?" asked LaCheapo, who was inquiring about Mr. Prince.  

"He sleeps in there some nights." Answered Tammy.  "He'll be fine."

Tammy climbed into her environmental destruction mobile and rode into the night, thinking to herself how fun it would be to rule the world.  She took a left out of the SAU parking lot, and headed to the Citgo station for the most expensive gas in town.  As she headed in the direction of the gas station, she noticed something familiar.

It was the 1984 Ford Bronco.

"I thought i got rid of them!" she said aloud.  "What the hell are the chances?"

Inside the Bronco our two heroes were conversing about what they had heard minutes before.

"This is ridiculous!" said calvin from the passenger seat.  "HOw does she think she is going to takeover the world?  She has to be stopped."

"Well, " Ross began, as he steered the Rossmobile into Burger King. "It appears as if she thinks she has more power than she actually does.  Do you want something?"

"No, Ross.  I dont want anything.  Maybe she has more power than we know of.  Did you ever think of that?"

"I'll have a whopper jr., no mayo or onion.  Yeah, i'll make it a combo.  You sure you dont want anything, calvin?"  Ross asked, appalled that calvin wouldnt want something to eat after a long night of spying.

"uhm, i guess i'll have some small fries."  Answered Calvin, who decided that spy talk could wait until later.  It was time to enjoy some fast food.

Back at the Citgo station...

The store clerk didnt know how to handle the situation, but she decided that if she kept her mouth shut and did what she was told, she might narrowly avoid death.  But then she began to think about how nice it would be to die this early in her shift.  She was already out of cigarettes and had no money.  Suddenly, the barrel of Tammy's gun looked rather inviting.

"Come on, Come on!" Yelled Tammy, holding the Glock like a pro.  "You heard me! I want all of the Pall Malls!  Throw a couple of Black and Milds in there too!"

"Why would you want Pall Malls?" asked the clerk, who bent over to get a back big enough to hold all of the cigarettes.  She decided she would make a half-hearted attempt at being shot.  "They're the cheapest cigarettes we have.  We sell stale Marlboros for more than we sell fresh Pall Malls.  You'd be getting more for your money with Marlboros."  She didnt really care what kind of cigarettes Tammy stole, but she figured that if she could secretly keep a pack hidden, she could have them to herself and say they were stolen.  She didnt care for Pall Malls.

"Are you serious?" asked Tammy, still pointing the gun.  "You have a fucking gun pointed at you and you're jeering the person holding it. "are you fucking serious?" she asked again.

"Fine, Fine.  Jeez." Said the clerk. Pall Malls would have to do for tonight.  "Do you want the cartons still intact or can i just dump all the individual cigarettes into the bag?"

"Why the hell would i just want a bunch individual cigarettes?" asked Tammy, growing more and more dissatisfied with her heist by the second.

"So that i wont have to waste another plastic bag.  It's better for the environment."

"I drive a fucking Land Rover!!" yelled Tammy.  The clerk proceeded to fill two more bags full of cheap cigarettes.  Tammy took them, and then hopped into her Rover and drove off into the night, ignoring her prize, which was sitting on the passenger seat.

Tammy had big plans for those Pall Malls.  Big Plans.